How To Deal With A Mean Drunk Boyfriend
- Your Safety First
- Addressing the Issue When He’s Sober
- Setting Boundaries
- Underlying Issues
- Supporting Healthy Choices
- Individual Therapy
- Support System
- When to Consider Leaving
Your Safety First
De-Escalation: If he’s already mean or belligerent, prioritize your safety. Avoid arguing or trying to reason with him. Remove yourself from the situation if possible. Stay with a trusted friend, family member, or call a safe ride service.
Emergency Plan: Have a safety plan in place for similar situations. Know where your phone is, have emergency numbers programmed, and consider keeping a spare set of keys or a getaway bag with essentials ready. Blow Foam
Addressing the Issue When He’s Sober
Open Communication: When he’s calm and sober, discuss his behavior. Express how his meanness makes you feel and the impact it has on the relationship.
Setting Boundaries:
Clearly state that his behavior is unacceptable. You deserve to be treated with respect, even (especially) when he’s intoxicated.
Understanding the Root Cause:
Underlying Issues
His mean behavior while drunk might stem from deeper issues like low self-esteem or unresolved past experiences. Encourage him to explore these with a therapist.
Supporting Healthy Choices
Limit Alcohol Consumption: If he can’t control his behavior while drinking, suggest limiting alcohol intake or avoiding it altogether.
Alternative Activities: Propose alternative ways to spend time together that don’t involve alcohol.
Seeking Professional Help: Blow Foam
Individual Therapy
Encourage him to seek individual therapy to understand his relationship with alcohol and manage his anger.
Couples Therapy: Consider couples therapy to learn healthy communication skills and address the impact of his drinking on the relationship.
Taking Care of Yourself:
Support System
Maintain a strong support system of friends and family who can offer emotional support and help you cope with the situation.
Self-Care: Prioritize your own well-being. Engage in activities that relieve stress, like exercise, meditation, or spending time with loved ones who make you feel good.
Know Your Limits: You can’t control his behavior, but you can control your response. Set boundaries and prioritize your mental health.
When to Consider Leaving
Unwillingness to Change: If he shows no effort to address his drinking or behavior, the relationship might not be salvageable.
Escalating Abuse: If the meanness becomes verbal or physical abuse, leaving the relationship might be necessary to protect yourself.
Remember
You are not responsible for his behavior.
You deserve a loving and respectful relationship.
It’s okay to prioritize your safety and well-being.
Dealing with a mean drunk boyfriend can be scary and draining. By prioritizing your safety, setting boundaries, and seeking support, you can navigate this situation effectively. If his behavior doesn’t change, or poses a threat to your well-being, leaving the relationship might be the healthiest choice.
